A soft knock at the bedroom woke Taylor from his fitful nap. After the panic attack earlier, he had all but passed out on his bed for the rest of the afternoon, his brain exhausted from thinking about how he was going to fix this. “Come in,” he croaked, his voice scratchy with sleep. The door creaked open slowly and Zac uncertainly stuck his head in. “Hey, Zac,” Taylor said, starting to sit up, but laying down again when the pressure inside his head made him feel as if it was about to split open.

“Hey,” Zac said softly, opening the door wider and stepping inside the room. “I just wanted to come make sure you were okay. You scared the crap out of me earlier.”

Taylor winced and put his hands over his eyes. “Can you shut the door? The light’s bothering me.”

Zac hurriedly shut the door behind him, blocking out the light from the hallway that had entered the room, and the room plunged into semi-darkness. A hint of the afternoon sunlight was still creeping around the heavy curtains, giving everything an unnatural glow. “Look, Tay…I know you and I have never been especially close…” Surprised at how this conversation was starting, Taylor uncovered his eyes and looked over at his brother. Zac looked like the epitome of discomfort. His eyes were staring intently at his shoes, which were busy trying to scuff a hole in the carpet big enough for him to escape into should he decide to. “I just…um – I wanted to let you know that…even though I can’t understand what you’re going through, I’m here if you ever need someone to talk to, you know?”

“Thanks, Zac,” Taylor said slowly, the shock deepening. He had never been especially close emotionally with his brothers, but Zac even less than Isaac. In all their years together, they had always gotten along. But the secret to their success was that they were hardly ever around each other long enough to cause an argument. Rarely did they turn to each other to confide in, but even more rarely did one of them offer themselves as a person to turn to. “I…really appreciate that,” he continued, not really sure how to respond.

“Did you need anything? Some water or something?” Zac asked, finally ceasing his toe-rubbing and looking up from the floor.

“Actually, I could really talk to Landis right now. Would you mind bringing me the phone?”

It took all of Zac’s energy to restrain himself from screaming at his older brother with that simple request. It had been nearly two hours since Taylor’s panic attack, and for that entire time, Zac had been contemplating what to say to his brother. And now, after all but begging Taylor not to shut him out, to talk to him, he didn’t even seem to care. Again, he was turning to Landis, as he had always done. Zac didn’t heave the sigh dwelling in his lungs until he had left the room in search of the phone, thinking he was stupid to have even bothered. Taylor had never needed him before, so why now?

Taylor sighed as Zac returned to the room, tossed him the phone and snapped the door shut. He knew he was being stupid for turning his brother away when he had put himself out there in such a way, but he couldn’t bring himself to talk about something so huge, so crucial, with anyone but Landis. I’ll make it up to him later, he thought as he dialed Landis’ number.

Ten minutes later, she was at his side, stroking his hair and consoling him as no one but she could. After a few minutes of silence, Landis spoke. “Tay, I’m going to tell you something I’ve been thinking about for a long time, since this whole thing with Jackson started, and I don’t want you to take it the wrong way, but…you are the most beautiful person I’ve ever met. I know everyone can see how beautiful you are on the outside, but in here?” Landis placed her hand over his heart. “In here is a heart that has a purpose. I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone care for and dote over another person as much as you do with Jackson, and be completely selfless and sincere at the same time. You’d do anything for her and expect nothing in return. Jackson is so lucky to have someone like you, and I don’t know if she fully realizes that yet. You’re my best friend, Taylor. I know we don’t usually use that term for each other, but it’s true. I have faith in you, and I know if anyone can pull her through this, it’s you.”

“God, Landis,” Taylor said, closing his eyes as he took in the words he’s just heard. “How do you always know the right things to say to make me feel…”

“Feel what?” she asked, urging him to finish the thought.

“Whole,” he finished, opening his eyes and looking into hers.

Blushing profusely, Landis turned her face away shyly. “Shut up, Taylor. I’m your friend and I’m just trying to be there for you.”

Before Taylor could even register the thought, words tumbled out of his mouth. “Why couldn’t I have just fallen for you instead?”

“Taylor, what in the hell are you-”

Silencing her question, Taylor pressed his lips quickly against hers. As quickly as he had initiated it, it was over. Landis opened her eyes and laughed as they both shook their heads from side to side. “Sorry,” Taylor said, slumping down against the headboard. “I have no idea where that came from.”

“It’s okay,” Landis grinned. “You were bound to get curious sooner or later…”

“Oh, so you’re saying you’ve never been the slightest bit curious about kissing me?” Taylor asked skeptically, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Never!” she exclaimed, laughing and leaning back against the wall.

“You’re such a liar,” he proclaimed, laughing along with her as he continued to tease her.

“Okay, maybe once when I was like…twelve,” she admitted with a shrug.

“Ha!” Taylor’s entire face lit up with her admission. “I knew it!” Suddenly reality came cruelly crashing back and his smile disappeared. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed, and after everything that had happened, he felt guilty for doing so right then. “Landis, what am I gonna do?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Aw, Tay…” Landis pulled him into a tight hug. “I love you. I may not be able to love you the way Jackson does, but I really do love you. I know you’re going to think of the right words to fix this. And no matter what happens, you can always know you have my love, okay? I can’t tell you what to say…that has to come from your heart. But I’ll always be here for you.”

Their embrace lasted several minutes, neither of them saying a word as their breathing fell into unison. Finally, they drifted apart, and Taylor planted a kiss on her forehead, touching her soft, fiery red hair. “You’re an amazing best friend, Landis.”

_______________________

Taylor felt like he was walking around in a haze at work several days later. He’d talked to Jackson several times, each time failing to find the right words, but managing to convince her to wait just a little while longer, not to go and have the operation done until they could sit down and discuss it face to face. Jackson, as determined as she was, had agreed to at least grant him that. But the resoluteness in her voice every time they talked was enough to make him think it was hopeless.

As he was finishing bringing a tray of orders out to one of his tables, the door to the restaurant opened, and a very familiar face appeared. Charisma Prescott smiled and flittered her fingers toward him in greeting. He forced a half-hearted smile before mumbling for his table to enjoy their meal and hurrying into the kitchen as the hostess led Charisma to a table in his section.

When he was safe behind the swinging double doors of the kitchen, he sighed and leaned against the counter, squeezing the edge tightly in his hands. It was never a good surprise when Charisma showed up at the restaurant.

Carter and Charisma Prescott were sisters who happened to be Jackson’s best friends. The three of them had grown up next door to each other and spent their entire childhoods together. Despite the fact that the Prescotts had since moved to another house and were no longer next door, it hadn’t changed their relationship with Jackson at all. When Taylor and Jackson had begun dating, Charisma had no qualms about admitting to Taylor that she was attracted to him. Taylor had never dared admit to Jackson what Charisma had told him, knowing it would strain and possibly end the girls’ relationship, and he couldn’t bear to put Jackson through that. Charisma, knowing Taylor would never say anything, had kept the truth from Jackson as well. But it had never stopped her from doing her best to pursue Taylor whenever she could. Guilt at her actions had begun to start nagging at her now that Jackson was pregnant. But if being her best friend had never stopped her before, pregnancy surely wouldn’t either.

Eventually, after he realized he’d wasted enough time in the back, he forced himself to go back out and face her. After all, he had a job to do and money to make, no matter who the customer was. Ever since Jackson had gotten pregnant, he’d hoped in the back of his mind that it would end Charisma’s advances, and he had actually begun to gain a little more hope when she stopped showing up for awhile. But her presence there today crushed every one of those hopes. He stepped up to the table, a fake smile on his face. She grinned up at him, folding her hands over the menu in front of her. “Hey, Charisma,” he said, struggling not to clench his teeth so tightly as he spoke. “What can I get you to drink?”

“A water will be fine,” she said, smiling happily as if she was sure Taylor was thrilled to see her. When he returned with her glass of ice water, she grabbed his hand. “Tay, honestly, how are you holding up?” she asked, her smile gone and now replaced with a look of concern. “Jackson told me about the abortion.”

As much as he already disliked her, he really hated her for coming all the way down there just to rub the situation in his face. He wanted to smack the look of fake worry off of her face and tell her to leave and never talk to him again. But his love for Jackson and his desire for her to be happy always prevented him from telling Charisma to leave him alone. Instead, he snatched his hand away. “Thanks for your concern, but I’d rather not talk about this right now,” he snapped. “Are you ready to order, or do you need a few more minutes?”

His voice was curt, and the smile was beginning to fade. “Jesus, Taylor, I was just trying to be nice,” she said, making a face as if she couldn’t believe he was being so ungrateful for her concern.

Rolling his eyes quickly while she wasn’t looking, he said in a more soft tone, “I’m sorry, Charisma, I’ve just been going through a lot, and I really don’t want to talk about it right now. I didn’t mean to snap at you.”

“It’s all right,” she said, happy that she had gotten the reaction she wanted. As much as she loved Jackson, she couldn’t stop herself from wanting Taylor more than she had ever wanted another guy in her life, and the fact that she was able to get such an apology out of him made her feel as if her visit had been worth it. She hoped that one day, and one day soon, Taylor would realize what he was missing out on by not giving her a chance. “I understand. I just wanted to stop by and see how you were. I guess I’ll just have the house salad,” she said, handing him the menu and smiling again.

Taylor scribbled down the order and said, “All right, I’ll have it out for you in a few minutes,” as if he hadn’t heard a word of the first part of her speech.

As he continued to work, he did his best to avoid looking in her direction unless it was absolutely necessary. He wanted nothing more than to call Jackson at that second and tell her how good of a friend Charisma really was, but he knew that the idea of losing her best friend would put her over the edge and he would no longer be able to convince her to put the abortion off. So instead, he filed this latest incident away in his mind, knowing that one day, he would have to tell her the truth. But when that day would come, he had no idea.